Josephine Hughes (She/Her)

Have you ever sat in front of a blank computer screen desperately trying to write your directory profile and feeling completely stuck? You wonder what on earth you can say to tell potential clients about your private practice.

You sit there thinking you’ve got no ideas or you’re not very good at writing. But another factor may be in play and that imposter syndrome, which is what we’re going to be talking about in today’s episode.

Welcome to the Good Enough Counsellors podcast. I’m Josephine Hughes, and today’s episode is all about how imposter syndrome affects therapists who are writing their directory profiles.

You might be surprised how common this is amongst the many counsellors I work with, but it’s holding you back from attracting the clients you want to help.

So today we’re going to look at how imposter syndrome shows up when you’re writing your profile and what to do about it, together with some practical tips on how to improve what you’re actually saying. Let’s return to that blank computer screen. If you’re sitting there feeling clueless, you’ll probably do a number of things.

First of all, complete avoidance by distracting yourself with social media or a Spotify playlist. Maybe you’ll find that CPD recording you’ve been meaning to watch for ages.

After all, you tell yourself it won’t do any harm to know a bit more about how to work with clients. Conveniently ignore the fact that you haven’t actually got any clients who need this at the moment.

Another thing you might do is consult AI, artificial intelligence. But even though it tells you what to say, you’re really not sure because it doesn’t really sound like you.

And isn’t it a bit pushy to say things like that? After all, you don’t want to be too persuasive. You want to respect client’s autonomy. You maybe hesitate over it and then decide.

You’ll consult your ethical framework or your supervisor before making a decision.

Alternatively, in the search for ideas, you’ll look at what other therapists are saying in their profiles and you can literally feel your heart sinking as you read because they all sound so put together, so qualified, so knowledgeable, with so much experience, how can you possibly compete with them? Is it worth even trying?

Your foray into the world of profile writing comes to an abrupt halt and you slink away, too ashamed to admit to anyone that you haven’t been able to write it or update it. And as I mentioned in last week’s episode on Imposter syndrome and social media shame thrives on secrecy.

So what I want to tell you is that you’re not alone in these feelings. How do I know? Because I work day in, day out with counsellors who are working on their marketing, and I know they find it really, really hard.

We have a lot of questions that come up, but they all have an underlying theme and that is not feeling good enough. Imposter syndrome is that feeling of being a fake, of not being smart enough and not deserving to be here.

People with imposter syndrome often try to resolve their feelings by working harder to prove that they are good enough. Yet they don’t attribute their success to their work and abilities, they attribute it to luck.

Imposter syndrome can make you doubt your experience and undervalue your strengths, and it makes it particularly difficult to promote yourself in your marketing.

Let’s have a look at how imposter syndrome can show up in directory writing have you ever noticed that people list all their qualifications, even the two hour afternoon workshop? But how much time do you spend reading the list? If you’re looking for a therapist? Indeed, is that the most important thing you look for?

Yes, it’s helpful to check out that your therapist is adequately qualified, but people may well assume that you are both from your membership of a professional association and your presence on a directory in the first place.

And while qualifications can provide reassurance, they may also create distance because they confer an aura of expertise that clients find intimidating. It begs the who is this list of qualifications for? Is it for clients or is it to prove that you do actually belong?

When you’re feeling like you need to prove yourself, you may well hide behind your qualifications. It’s like you’re saying, look at my credentials. I am allowed to be here, but clients are looking for connection, not certificates.

Here’s my first practical tip. Rather than focusing on your qualifications, share your passion for therapy. Tell your story about why you’re a therapist. It will help to build trust.

Another way that impostor syndrome can show up is in the vexed subject of niching. I’m increasingly seeing posts in therapist groups about this, and I’ve noticed there are myths and misunderstandings circulating on social media.

One of them is that you have to have a lot of experience to have a niche. If you have imposter syndrome, this belief is going to stop you in your tracks and you’ll never specialise.

You’ll always believe you need to know that little bit more before you can say that this is your specialism. And yet the opposite is true. It’s by niching that you actually gain that extra experience.

Choosing a niche at an early stage of your career means you can focus your efforts on building knowledge of a particular client group, both by working with them and having focused CPD. An example of someone who has done this from an early stage of their career is my client, Chloe Foster of Sussex Rainbow Counselling.

Listen to Chloe describing the success of her LGBTQ niche in episode 27 of the Good Enough Counsellors podcast and she tells you how she’s been able to expand her niche to create extra income for her business.

If you feel you don’t know enough to specialise, it’s going to lead to a profile where you try to appeal to everyone and that won’t grab anyone’s attention.

So here’s my second practical reframe the idea of niching from being an expert to being someone with an interest in working with clients in this area.

Think of it as a way to make your profile stand out to those clients, because a focus profile is more likely to attract those people who will truly benefit from working with you. Alongside the fear of niching is the fear of judgment. You question whether you’re qualified enough to highlight certain skills or experience.

What if you say something and someone questions it? Or despite your knowledge and training, you worry that you’ll get it wrong because you don’t believe in yourself.

As a result, you may hedge your bets. In other words, you avoid being specific and you try to appeal to everyone. You don’t feel confident enough to claim your expertise.

You downplay your skills and you minimise your training and experience by being vague. You think you’re protecting yourself from criticism when in fact you’re writing a profile that’s so bland it’s likely to fail.

In this way, you sabotage yourself and sadly prove the truth in inverted commas that you don’t belong. And have you ever done this? Looked at other people’s profiles and mimicked what they’ve said?

When you’re experiencing self doubt, you may look to others for inspiration and use their ideas.

The problem with this, apart from the copyright implications, is that sounding like someone else means potential clients won’t get to know the real you. They’ll only be disappointed if they make a booking and you’re different to what you projected.

If you mimic others, your profile may well end up sounding generic and similar to others and lead to few bookings. Practical tip number three be clear about how you can help and what sets you apart.

Personalise your profile by sharing your interest in certain areas of therapy. Impostor syndrome can also leak into the words and phrases you choose to use.

I think there’s often a reluctance within us to make claims about our client work. We respect that clients are the ones that choose to change, and the results that we see are due to their individual courage.

We know that an approach that works with one client may not work with another. We’re aware of our duty of candor towards clients. As a result, we’re hesitant to represent what we offer as a cast iron guarantee.

However, that can become muddled by imposter syndrome and lead to a reluctance to make clear statements. For example, you’ll I aim to help or I aim to support rather than I help or I support.

This creates uncertainty for the person reading can you help them or not? Practical tip number four it’s going to feel uncomfortable, but it’s time to claim the difference you make to clients lives.

Yes, they’re the ones who choose to change, but you’re the one who, with skilled listening, facilitates that change. After all, if you really didn’t do anything, why do we bother having a counselling profession at all? Why bother training? Why bother advertising?

The truth is, you do make a difference. Make a list of the clients you’ve helped. Keep a record of the comments when they’ve thanked you.

Listen when they tell you that counseling has been life changing and practice confident language in your profile. Say things like, I help clients or I specialize in. Now, I can’t imagine what you’re thinking in response to this.

You’re concerned that you may sound too pushy and salesy. I heard a great conversation on the rest is politics us podcast the other day.

In case you haven’t listened to it, the presenters are an english journalist, Katie K. And an American, Anthony Scaramucci, otherwise known as the Mooch.

When Kay invited listeners to buy tickets to an event with a typical british understatement, you may like to visit our website. The mooch immediately picked her up on it. You’re so british, he said. An American would say, get on down there and grab your tickets while you can.

We’re a lot less brash than that in selling our counselling services. In fact, I even hesitate to say selling because that in itself can feel deeply uncomfortable to us.

Therapists and many counsellors who are also introverts hate to draw attention to themselves.

They find smoking statements in profiles frustrating because these lack depth and anything that smacks of selling feels in direct opposition to client autonomy.

Add impostor syndrome into this mix and therapists shy away from stating their strengths and helping clients understand the value of what they provide to. But that’s such a shame. Potential clients need to know that counselling will help them. By hiding, you’re doing them a disservice.

You’re preventing them from accessing the help that could literally change their lives. Perhaps the Americans have got something to teach us. Being direct can help people to make decisions and not miss out.

Practical tip number five offer yourself this reframe. You’re not selling. You’re helping. You’re helping someone who is looking for support to find the right therapist.

If you’re clear about what you do, that will give them the opportunity to choose and make a decision. How can people choose a therapist from limited information and profiles that all sound the same?

Remember, by telling them about your service, you’re actually increasing their ability to make an autonomous choice. When I published gloriously unready, my podcast about being the mum of transgender kids, I was full of self doubt.

What would people think had I got it wrong? But what really helped me was remembering that I was speaking from my experience. People can’t argue with your experience of life.

This thought may really help you as you write your profile. Speak from your experience. Share what is true for you and the difference it has made for clients.

Write as if you were speaking to a potential client in a session on how you can help be you, because clients are looking for someone who is human. However, the act of sharing yourself online is really scary, particularly if you feel like an imposter.

And the answer is, as I shared last week, is to douse the shame with empathy. And this is where I can help you with my make your profile work training.

You don’t have to write your profile alone because in the implementation week, which takes place from the 21st to the 25 October 2024, you’ll be part of a group that is exploring how best to present your unique skills and experience in a directory. There’s nothing like being part of a group of people who are experiencing the same doubts and fears of yourself.

It helps to normalize your experience and helps you to know that you’re not alone.

During the course of the week, you’ll have the chance to draft the main elements of your profile and I provide directions and feedback so that you can make it speak to the people you’d love to work with. I’d love you to join me, which you can do by becoming part of therapy growth group.

It costs 50 pounds for a month’s membership and you’ll definitely get more than 50 pounds of value because you’ll also be able to listen to all my exclusive training while you’re there. Now you’ve listened to this episode, why not review your profile in the light of what you’ve learned?

Take a look at whether you’re being too general and minimising what you do. Are you shying away from telling people about the work you really love to do? Remember, use that reframe that. You’re not being salesy.

You’re serving clients by helping them make a decision. You’re speaking from your experience. Remember, you’ve put in all those years of study and hours of sitting and listening. You are good enough.

In closing, I’d like to share an affirmation from Denise Duffield Thomas, the money coach. This affirmation helps your brain to focus on the positive rather than the fear. Say after me, it’s my time and I’m ready for the next step.

I hope your next step is working more closely with me. Just go along to josephinehuges.com workwithme and get booked in for your make your profile work by joining therapy Growth group.

Thanks for listening. Do come and join my Facebook community. Good enough counsellors.

And for more information about how I can help you develop your private practice, please visit my website, josephinehughes.com. if you found this episode helpful, I’d love it if you could share it with a fellow therapist or leave a review on your podcast app.

And in closing, I’d love to remind you that every single step you make gets you closer to your dream. I really believe you can do it.