January can feel heavy for counsellors and a time of pressure. Enquiries might be quiet. Self-doubt can creep in. That familiar sense of falling behind can arrive before the year has really got going.
And while January is just one month, it often impacts how we feel about the year ahead.
That’s why I wanted to use this conversation with Eve Menezes Cunningham not only to reflect on January, but to gently widen the lens and think about how we might move through the rest of 2026 with more kindness.
Rather than treating this time of year as something to fix or push through, this episode explores what happens when we meet ourselves a little differently. With curiosity rather than criticism. With care for our nervous systems. And with a gentler relationship to pressure.
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In this episode of the Good Enough Counsellors podcast, I’m joined by Eve to talk about self-compassion, nervous system care, boundaries, neurodivergence, and a kinder way to approach January and the year ahead.
You can listen to the full episode here:
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This conversation is particularly relevant for counsellors and therapists in private practice who are feeling pressure at the start of the year, noticing rising self-criticism, or feeling the impact of stress and uncertainty on their nervous system. We talk about self-compassion, polyvagal theory, neurodivergence, boundaries, and how to take a gentler, more sustainable approach to working in private practice.
Why January feels hard for counsellors in private practice
January can be a tricky time for counsellors and therapists, especially those in private practice.
There’s often an unspoken expectation that things should feel clearer by now. That motivation should have kicked in. That enquiries should be picking up. When that doesn’t happen, it’s easy to turn the frustration inwards.
Uncertainty plays a big part. Client numbers can fluctuate. Income can feel unpredictable. Comparison is never far away. All of this quietly feeds anxiety and self-criticism.
For neurodivergent counsellors, or those who are particularly sensitive to pressure and change, this time of year can feel even harder. The push to “get going” doesn’t always sit comfortably with how our minds and bodies actually work.
Self-compassion and being kinder to yourself as a counsellor
In this episode, Eve and I talk about self-compassion in a very real, practical way.
Eve brings together therapy, yoga therapy, coaching and writing, and her approach feels deeply human. We talk about how being kinder to ourselves isn’t about letting ourselves off the hook, but about creating the conditions where we can actually think more clearly and function more sustainably.
We explore how understanding ourselves better can soften shame and self-criticism. Especially when we stop expecting ourselves to cope with uncertainty as if it has no impact on us.
Kindness, in this sense, isn’t indulgent. It’s a way of working that supports longevity in a profession where emotional labour is part of the job.
Nervous system awareness and polyvagal theory explained simply
A big part of our conversation focuses on the nervous system.
Eve has a lovely, accessible way of explaining polyvagal theory using cats. She talks about three states: purr, hiss and hide.
- Purr is when we feel safe, connected and resourced
- Hiss is when we’re activated, anxious or on edge
- Hide is when we feel overwhelmed, shut down or frozen
This way of thinking helps counsellors notice what’s happening in their bodies without judgement. Instead of asking “what’s wrong with me?”, the question becomes “what state am I in, and what might help right now?”
For many counsellors, especially neurodivergent therapists, this can feel like a relief. It offers understanding rather than another thing to get right.
Neurodivergence, self-understanding and reducing self-criticism
We also talk about how learning more about ourselves, including neurodivergence, can change how we relate to our struggles.
Discovering things like ADHD, autism, or heightened sensitivity can help make sense of long-standing patterns such as burnout, overthinking and people-pleasing.
Rather than seeing these experiences as personal flaws, Eve invites us to see them as ways our systems learned to cope and survive. That shift alone can reduce a lot of shame.
Understanding ourselves better doesn’t label us. It gives us more choice.
Why boundaries feel so uncomfortable to set
Another theme we explore is boundaries.
Many counsellors know what boundaries they’d like to set, but still find them emotionally difficult. This is especially true for people who learned early on that pleasing others helped them feel safe.
Eve talks about how boundary-setting can feel deeply uncomfortable because it activates old survival responses. The discomfort doesn’t mean you’re doing it wrong, just that it’s important to hold yourself with compassion after setting a boundary. Often, the hardest part isn’t saying the boundary, but sitting with the feelings that follow.
A gentler way to approach January and the rest of 2026
We finish the episode with a simple but powerful idea.
What if you treated yourself as you would a beloved, precious creature?
With curiosity. With patience. With care.
Not as something to fix or improve, but as someone worthy of kindness, even when things feel messy or uncertain.
This way of relating to yourself isn’t just for January. It can shape how you move through the rest of 2026 too, especially if you want your practice to feel more sustainable and less driven by pressure.
Taking small, manageable steps in your private practice
If you’re reading this and thinking, I want to be kinder to myself, but I also don’t want to feel stuck, you’re really not alone.
Many counsellors don’t struggle because they lack motivation or ideas. They struggle because everything feels like too much at once. When pressure is high, it can be hard to know what the next step should be, let alone find the energy to take it.
That’s why inside Therapy Growth Group, I focus on helping counsellors take small, manageable steps in their private practice, rather than trying to fix everything at once.
Therapy Growth Group is a membership for counsellors in private practice who want support with marketing, confidence, and growing their work in a way that feels sustainable. It’s particularly supportive if you’re feeling overwhelmed, self-critical, or unsure how to move forward without adding more pressure.
That’s why Therapy Growth Group includes the 12 Action Steps programme. It’s a gentle, practical framework that breaks practice-building and marketing down into clear, doable actions you can fit around client work and real life.
There’s no pressure to keep up, no expectation to be perfect, and plenty of support along the way.
If a kinder way of approaching your work in 2026 sounds appealing, you can find out more about Therapy Growth Group here.