How do counsellors manage to post consistently on social media and overcome fear such as making mistakes, feeling like an imposter or that no-one is interested?
Making Mistakes
It is painful to make mistakes. We’re wired for connection and the thought that we might do something that causes people to laugh at us or reject is often enough to stop us in our tracks.
Social media can be a judgemental place to be. People don’t hold back on their opinions and often say things in a hurtful way. When we’re just starting out and not feeling confident, the experience of criticism can be a show stopper.
Ways to cope with this are:
- Reframe
See your mistakes as learning experiences. Be kind to yourself, it’s unrealistic to expect perfection especially when you’re just starting out. The mantra: “you’re either winning or learning” can be helpful here.
- Refocus
Remember who you’re doing this for. This is for your clients. It’s not for people who take pleasure in pointing out your mistakes. If you pick yourself up and continue to post consistently you will attract the people who need you.
- Remind
Remind yourself to be you. This effort is not about a popularity contest. It’s about you turning up for your potential clients. It is about you creating the business and lifestyle of your dreams. You’re not doing this for acceptance and approval but to build a private practice.
When we’re criticised our tendency is to hide ourselves away. However, having people around you who understand and support you can make all the difference.
That’s how my Therapy Growth Group was born. It’s a group of therapists who want to support each other as they grow their practices. Contact Me to find out more.
Photo by Andrej Lišakov on Unsplash
Fear of Being An Imposter
This is where we worry that we’re being inauthentic: that we don’t have the necessary skills and experience to be setting ourselves up as an expert.
But remember:
- The Myth
Research shows that the thought we’re an imposter is shared by about 70% of the population. Although we believe it is true of us, everyone else believes it is true of them too. Either most of us are imposters, or our self-assessment is warped. I think it may be the latter.
- Our Role
It’s helpful to remember we don’t have to be an expert. We’re simply contributing to the conversation. It takes many voices for a message to be heard and people need to hear it in different ways. And we don’t need to have all the answers. It’s unhealthy both for us and other people to expect that of ourselves. Acknowledging there may be other people out there who can help is a relief.
- Believe
Remember all the studying, CPD, personal development and hours listening that you have already done. You know a surprising amount. Remember – you are trying to help potential clients – not your peers or your trainers.
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Fear of Being Irrelevant
It’s part of imposter syndrome to think that what you’ve got to say is not worth noticing.
When you have an idea about yourself, “confirmation bias” means you look for evidence to support your theory.
So if you’re posting on social media and not getting a response, that might make you think that you’re irrelevant. You think your views are not important. It’s just not worth trying.
Photo by John Schnobrich on Unsplash
However there is often another explanation and that’s to do with the skill of building an audience. It’s about sharing posts in such a way that people want to respond and want to get to know you better. It’s a skill – not a God given talent.
Therefore it’s something you can learn and it’s something I can help you to develop with training and coaching.
Join my group coaching programme The Therapy Growth Group and I’ll show you how.
Contact me to find out more.